Thursday, February 3, 2011

Are you sure, Mr. Groundhog?


How Sure Are you, anyway?

Mr. Groundhog,

My husband and I have a very good question for you. How can we know for sure that you didn't see your shadow? How do you communicate what you saw or did not see to the guy who proclaims your decision? Do you speak human? Does he understand groundhog? Do you have a special paw signal? Is it some form of groundhog to human telepathy?

You see, you're expecting us to accept your decision in this matter, and after THIS winter, known to many as Snowmegeddon, we need to be sure - because we've all had quite enough winter - in fact, we don't have to have anymore winter now, or for that matter, ever - and I'd be quite happy, thank you!

I'm a little concerned about just accepting your "word" as fact that Spring will be here early. You haven't really had a reliable track record, you know. I think my own form of predicting Spring is a little more accurate.

For this area, it's pretty safe to say, though not always accurate, that by the end of March - the worst is over. At least by that time, we're starting to get sunshine, longer days, a few crocuses (or croci - whichever is proper), and a few sprinkles of rain, instead of snow.

So, I believe you're wrong about Spring being early this year. I don't think it's going to get here any faster than it usually does - around the end of March! And since my husband believes that I am only warm one Saturday in late July, even end of March won't be "Spring" enough for me!

So, Phil, Dave, Marsha or whichever groundhog you are, give us a reason to trust you? Explain how you come by this conclusion. What kind of facts do you have that shadow-vision or non-shadow vision works? We save this special day every year for your decision, but I'm beginning to think it's a pretty unreliable resource. Where's your data?

Waiting for your answer....
and counting the days 'til Spring - which I predict will be in around 56 days, give or take a day.

No comments: